Raylan 

By Elmore Leonard

288 pages

Originally published Dec. 26, 2012 by William Morrow

Raylan, the second of two books I read this month for the Mules, is, in some ways, better than Hombre, which I reviewed on Aug. 26.

It’s a story about a tough deputy US Marshal that returns to the place he grew up in to track down some seriously bad guys. Raylan Givens is a cool cat. Affable and low key – both compassionate and lethal in carrying out his duties among the denizens of the Appalachian Mountains of eastern Kentucky.

Elmore Leonard wrote three Raylan novels based on his short story “Fire in the Hole.” This one, interestingly, was written after FX made a television series – Justified – based on the first two. (See my review of Justified, below.)

Neither the book nor the FX series is high art, but they are both smart, well written, and thoroughly enjoyable. I recommend them.

Critical Reception 

* “In addition to kinetic storytelling and spot-on dialogue, Leonard has a cool wit…. Characters roll from scene to scene, urged on by self-interest and greed, bumping against one another and building up steam until they’re smashing together in orgies of violence.” (New York Times Book Review)

* “The smarter crooks give Raylan grudging respect; his fellow lawmen grant him their highest praise: ‘You’re doin’ a job the way we like to see it done.’ The same can be said of the 86-year-old Elmore Leonard.” (Wall Street Journal)

* “[Leonard’s] finely honed sentences can sound as flinty/poetic as Hemingway or as hard-boiled as Raymond Chandler. His ear for the way people talk – or should – is peerless.” (Detroit News)

Justified 

A 6-part series developed for TV by Graham Yost

Starring Timothy Olyphant, Nick Searcy, and Joelle Carter

Available on various streaming services, including Netflix and Amazon Prime

The TV series, comprising 78 episodes, premiered on FX on March 16, 2010 and concluded on April 14, 2015. Like the novel Raylan (reviewed above), the series focuses on a recurring character created by Elmore Leonard – played brilliantly in the series by Timothy Olyphant.

I watched some of it last year. And since I read the book, I’m back to watching it again.

Critical Reception 

* “A compelling and complex series.” (The Guardian/UK)

* “This isn’t just some rote crime procedural. It’s the Hatfields and the McCoys, but with federal agents, mob bosses, drug dealers, and rocket launchers. What else do you need?” (Dennis Tang, GQ)

* “The series never quite earns its gushiest accolades… but it has qualities all its own: in an age of cable gravitas, it’s genuinely funny, with the pungent eccentricity of Elmore Leonard’s universe of odd birds.” (Emily Nussbaum, The New Yorker)

I’m starting a new department: Conspiracy Theory of the Week. Once a week, I’ll give you one or several of the most outlandish conspiracy theories I come across from the right- and the left-leaning media.

This first one is so juicy, you won’t be able to resist it. The story is that the Canadian health care system, nearly broke from providing universal coverage, is limiting its losses through euthanasia counseling.

I think it’s got to be a conspiracy. But you decide. Click here.

The conservancy that I’m developing in West Delray Beach, FL, is destined to be (if I have anything to say about it) one of the largest and best-curated palm tree collections in the world. It also features a growing collection of outdoor sculptures, a traditionally styled Japanese tea house, a Zen Garden, and a Yoga/Jiu Jitsu House in the shade of a little bamboo forest. Not to mention a stock of African cycads, dozens of other exotic plants and trees, and one of Florida’s highest “mountains” at nearly 20 feet!

This is one of those exotic plants:

Bird of Paradise

Also known as Crane Flower and Bird’s-Tongue Flower 

Binomial name: Strelitzia reginae

The Bird of Paradise is a perennial, native to South Africa, that is related to the banana. It is stunning, distinctive, and beautiful. It grows to over six feet, and is designed to support the weight of birds that stop to drink the nectar. It has become a common ornamental plant in places that feature a warm climate year-round, like here in South Florida. But with enough light, it can be grown indoors.

For more information about Paradise Palms, click here.

Why I keep doing what I do… 

“You gave me advice when I was 19 back in 2005 in ETR that changed my life forever. While I was slow and stupid with the implementation, I wouldn’t be where I am today without it. Thank you!” – JH

A harrow is an agricultural implement – a heavy wooden rake that is dragged over plowed land to break up and smooth the surface. In a figurative sense, we use harrowing to describe something that ravages, plunders; causes extreme pain or distress. As I used it today: “I’ll be in Myrtle Beach for a week in October, a yearly get-together with some life-long friends, playing golf, watching football, talking shit, and reminiscing. We’ll rehash old stories about the halcyon days of high school. And there may be some private conversations about the harrowing days in Vietnam.”

Funniest Pet Photos of the Year 

In times like these, we need something, anything, to pick up our spirits. So, for your uplifting pleasure, I present Gizmodo’s finalists from this year’s Comedy Pet Photograph awards. Click here.

I’m Bigger. Much Bigger. But He’s Much Better… in More Ways Than One!

I want to introduce you to someone special. He’s someone I love and admire. But first, let’s talk about moi – i.e., my physical fitness routine.

I train for fitness twice a week. I do two hours with a trainer. A combination of stretching, weightlifting, bodyweight exercises, and high-intensity cardio. These workouts are good for me. So, I do them. But they are hard. And boring. So, I dread them.

Four days a week, I train in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu for an hour. (It’s grappling. Like wrestling, except the object is to “submit” your opponent by joint lock or strangulation.) Each session consists of five eight-minute bouts of moderate- to high-intensity grappling, with two or three minutes of instruction between each round.

For me, this is the perfect way to stay in shape. In terms of challenging the body, it’s like combining sprinting, powerlifting, yoga, and Pilates in the same workout. In terms of challenging the mind, it’s like a combination of speed chess and Zen meditation. My BJJ sessions are good for me. But, unlike my workouts with my trainer, I look forward to them. They feel like playing. The kind of playing I did when I was a child.

There is another reason I love BJJ: It gives me the chance to form friendships with people that I’d probably never otherwise know. Three of the four guys I train with are Brazilian. Eric is in his late twenties, Vitor is in his early thirties, Sam is in his early forties, and Renato is 51. Vitor and Sam weigh about 235 pounds, Eric is about my size at 205, and Renato normally weighs about 155 to 165.

In my journal yesterday, I wrote this about Renato:

Renato Tavares is a multiple-time world champion in three weight classes. He walks around at about 160 pounds. But once a year, for the World Master Championship tournament (usually held in Las Vegas), he gets down to 138. At 160 pounds, Renato looks like he could win an all-natural bodybuilding contest. Dropping to 138 means losing like 15% of his weight. That’s hard to do when you weigh 250 pounds. And when you weigh 160, it’s insanely difficult. I’ve asked Renato why he does it. After all, he is competitive at two classes heavier. He tells me that, for him, it is an extreme mental and moral challenge. And when he accomplishes it, he knows that he can also accomplish the many less extreme challenges he faces every day.

And he has plenty of challenges. Besides being a world-class athlete, Renato is a devoted husband and father, a friend to all who know him, an active philanthropist, a successful businessperson, and a lifelong learner.

I’ve known Renato for about 20 years. He came here as a member of American Top Team, one of the more successful teams competing in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and mixed martial arts. He quickly rose to the top of his class as an athlete. But he had other goals. He wanted to partake in the American Dream.

And that meant learning English. (He didn’t speak a word when he got here. He’s fluent now.) It meant getting a job. (He taught BJJ in his spare time.) Starting a side business. (He now has a BJJ association with members in the states and many foreign countries.) He saved every dollar he didn’t need to maintain a simple lifestyle and invested in real estate, one small purchase at a time. Today, he has a beautiful home, several investment properties that bring in monthly income, and a business that is profitable and growing.

He’s the hardest-working person I know. He’s also one of the kindest and most charitable. He’s done all that and he still manages to get better at his sport. The last time I trained with him, he was down to 145 pounds. I was “down” to 205. That’s a 40-pound difference. I felt like I was wrestling with an alligator.

How Renato finds the time to do everything he does and stay on top of his game at 51 years old is amazing. I often tell him, “I want to be just like you when I’m your age.” (That’s a joke. He doesn’t think it’s funny either.)

Anyway, last weekend he was off to compete in the World Master tournament in Vegas, while I was here in Nicaragua, sitting in my Tiki hut, with the beautiful beach and mountains in front of me. I had completely forgotten that Renato was competing when Sam, (one of my 235-pound training partners) texted to ask if I’d seen the news.

Renato took first place and now is ranked number one in his category (50+, black belt) at 138 pounds. As I’ve said, this isn’t the first world-championship belt he’s won. But when I consider all the other things he does, it’s truly inspiring.

And the way he won this year is doubly impressive. He won his first match in 43 seconds (knee bar). And the second one (wrist lock) in 13!!!

That’s him on the podium at the top of this article.

More Crime Ridden Than the US? You Wouldn’t Guess!

I’ve done a lot of writing about the surge of violent crime in the US in recent years. It’s bad. But there is a country in Europe where things are actually worse.

Before I saw the report that TS sent me, I never could have guessed which country it is. It’s a country I visited just a few years ago. And although I felt mostly safe and welcome, there were moments when I felt like I was in a marginal neighborhood in New York, Chicago, or LA.

I’m talking about Sweden.

Since 2000, Sweden has gone from being one of the safest countries in the world to being one of the most dangerous in Europe. It has one of the world’s worst recorded rape rates, and one of the highest rates of gun killings in Europe. And the violent crime is no longer confined to Sweden’s major cities. It is spreading to smaller towns and even rural areas.

What’s going on?

Sweden will hold general elections on September 11. For the first time in recent history, crime will be at the top of voters’ minds.

Learn more about all this here and here.

 

Meme Mania Is Back

I’m not taking this advice, because I don’t speculate. But if I were a speculator, I’d be tempted by this strategy presented by the Oxford Club’s Mathew Carr:

Now, we know these meme stocks are destined to crash and burn. It’s inevitable. And that steep pullback is a moneymaking opportunity.

Be warned: Trying to fight the meme stock so-called “apes” is more dangerous than trying to fight the Fed.

Here’s my advice: Rock the VROC.

Ignore the relative strength index, moving average convergence divergence, Bollinger Bands, the money flow index, or any other indicator you believe is going to give you an edge. When dealing with meme mania, we’re talking about the madness of crowds, and you want to watch the volume rate of change (VROC). This tells us whether volume is in an uptrend (a positive number) or a downtrend (a negative number) and whether the current price trend has conviction.

Here are my rules of thumb…

* If price is moving higher and the VROC is positive, DO NOT SHORT!

* If price is surging and the VROC is over 100, go with the flow… don’t try to fight against it.

* Buy calls.

* Be patient. Wait for the VROC to roll over and pocket profits on puts with the inevitable slide.

Like many septuagenarians, I sometimes worry that I’m sliding into dementia because my memory seems to be getting worse. I’m forgetting names, where I put my keys, and the titles of movies.

Not to worry, says Bruno Dubois, Director of the Institute of Memory and Alzheimer’s Disease (IMMA) at La Pitié-Salpêtrière Hospital Paris. “It often happens in people 60 years and older that they complain that they lack memory. The information is always in the brain, it is the ‘processor’ that is lacking.”

What I’m experiencing he says, is “anosognosia.” (See today’s “Word to the Wise” below.) It’s temporary forgetfulness. Not Alzheimer’s. In fact, he says, if you are conscious of and concerned about forgetfulness, you almost assuredly do NOT have dementia.

If you have doubts, here’s a test I got from BJ, a fellow septuagenarian:

  1. Find the C in the table below. 

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCOOOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  1. If you found the C, find the 6 in the table below. 

99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999

99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999

99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999

69999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999

99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999

99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999

  1. Now find the N in the table below. (A little more difficult!) 

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMNMM

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

If you found all three without a problem, you can cancel your visit to the neurologist. Your brain is in perfect shape!