“An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.” – Irv Kupcinet

What You Probably Didn’t Know About Thanksgiving

Some interesting things to ponder while enjoying your leftovers…

Backflow Friday

You know that Black Friday is a particularly hectic day for retail workers, but you may not know about another heavily affected industry – plumbing. According to Roto-Rooter, the Friday after Thanksgiving is their busiest day of the year. They attribute this to two things: (1) mishandled grease that finds its way into drains and garbage disposals and causes clogs, and (2) large gatherings of people that lead to bathroom overuse that stresses the system.

Same Old, Same Old… Only Different

Whether it’s for actual viewing or pleasant background noise, about 50 million Americans tune in to the annual Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade – an extravaganza that is estimated to cost between $11 million and $13 million each year. Another 3.5 million people usually brave the New York cold to watch it in person – some arriving as early as 6 am to get a good spot along the parade route, But this year, that’s not what happened. The only way to watch the parade was on TV. Yes, it had balloons and floats and celebrities and musical/theatrical performances, but (to avoid drawing crowds) there was no “parade route.” The action was centered around the Macy’s store at Herald Square, and much of it was pre-filmed.

The Great Balloon Massacre

Speaking of the Macy’s parade…

Originally, there was no limit to the size of the balloons in the parade – and they grew and grew. Strict regulations were put in place after strong winds damaged or demolished about 20 of the balloons in the 1997 event. The Pink Panther (one of the balloons that was subsequently banned from making future appearances) kept knocking over its handlers and had to be stabbed by the police to bring it down. Barney the Dinosaur flattened a tree, went out of control at 51st Street, and had to be stomped to death. And the Cat in The Hat – in what has been described as the worst accident in parade history – broke into the crowd, injuring 4 people, including one who was in a coma for a month.

Dutch Courage?

The commonly spouted Thanksgiving  “story” is that the pilgrims fled England to escape religious persecution. The truth is, they embarked on their journey from the highly tolerant country of Holland, where they had been living free from religious persecution (and the Church of England). Their mission was to remove their progeny from the materialism of Dutch culture and establish an ideal Christian commonwealth.

No Harm, [Probably] No Fowl

Another common narrative is that the pilgrims ended up oppressing and destroying the indigenous people whose settlement they stole upon arrival in 1621. In reality, the pilgrims came upon a nearly empty settlement that had already been destroyed by disease. One of the settlement’s survivors, Tisquantum (Squanto), would ultimately help the settlers cultivate crops and negotiate trades with the local Wampanoag chief Massasoit. Pilgrim governor William Bradford would even go on to call Squanto a “special instrument sent of God.” Their “Thanksgiving” was a three-day event (inspired by the Biblical holiday of Sukkot) celebrated by the settlers and Wampanoag, one that historians believe likely didn’t have turkey on the menu.

The First First Thanksgiving

Speaking of the first Thanksgiving…

Some historians tell us that the first Thanksgiving actually took place in Florida more than 50 years before the pilgrims got here. It happened on September 8, 1565 in St. Augustine – the day the Spanish settlers that founded the city came onshore, celebrated with a Thanksgiving Mass, and shared a meal with members of the local Seloy tribe. The food likely consisted of provisions that the settlers had brought with them on their ship (salted pork, garbanzo beans, hard biscuits, and wine), along with whatever the Seloy may have contributed (venison, tortoise, squash, fish… and maybe turkey).

Holy-Day? No Way!

On October 3, 1789, George Washington signed a proclamation designating Thursday, November 26 as a national day of thanks. But the proclamation was good only for that year. John Adams and James Madison, too, signed one-year-only proclamations. (Thomas Jefferson notably refused to acknowledge the day because he believed the religious connotations to be a direct violation of the First Amendment.) From then on, it was left up to the individual states. It wasn’t until 1863, when Abraham Lincoln proclaimed the last Thursday of November to be “a Day of Thanksgiving and Praise,” that it officially become an annual federal holiday.

The So-Called “Mother of Thanksgiving”

So who do we have to thank for Lincoln’s decision to make Thanksgiving a national holiday? Sarah Hale gets the credit, as she spent almost 40 years campaigning for it until she finally won over the president. As part of her campaign, Hale, the editor of Godey’s Lady’s Book, promoted the idea to her readers by publishing Thanksgiving-themed stories and poems and recipes for such things as roast turkey and pumpkin pie. (By the way, she is also credited with writing the poem that became the nursery rhyme “Mary Had a Little Lamb.”)

Our (Almost) National Bird

Following a congressional hearing in 1782, the Bald Eagle was selected as the national bird and symbol of the United States. But if Benjamin Franklin had his way, it would have been the turkey. Franklin admired the turkey’s territorial tenacity and had contempt for the eagle’s tendency to steal food from other animals. As he said in a letter to his daughter, “I wish the Bad Eagle had not been chosen…. He is a bird of bad moral character. He does not get his living honestly.”

It’s Not Just the Turkey That’s Stuffed

 Conking out on the couch after Thanksgiving dinner is almost a part of the tradition itself. We blame this so-called “turkey coma” on the mistaken belief that turkey is especially high in tryptophan, a sleep-inducing amino acid. The truth is, there just isn’t enough tryptophan in turkey to make you drowsy. (In fact, there’s more in chicken.) Chances are, you couldn’t keep your eyes open after dinner simply because you ate far too much of everything.

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